Tag Archives: lessons

my rain…

Today I woke up early. Could have slept in, but destiny had set an alarm.  Some friggin clock rang somewhere… First I was pissed off. Why today? I’m off, I can sleep however long I want – for once!!!

I woke up in the middle of a dream. I hate when I can’t close the stories and layer off slowly. I wanna finish that world and slowly transition into embracing the day. These cut-offs…I feel naked all day. I’m more vulnarable, I feel “revealed” in a sense…plus every other time, I become more doubtful than ever…

First world problems. Yes. I know. Yet something weighs my soul and it is on days like this I can release and let go…
I don’t have any energy to resist…

Thank God for healing arts, for eternal ways to let the soul express itself…




Some people say ”stop crying”.

When they say ”stop crying”,

”stop crying”,

they don’t know what they´re talking about.

It’s a phrase learnt from society,

based on fear & discomfort,

a wish that everything could be,



Each and every tear,

is a step closer to heal something…

I say


You will never regret a tear

it’s a release.

The soul feel ease.

If anyone tells you different,

it comes from resentment and bitterness.


Sometimes it’s better to shut up,

let the tears fall one by one.


One tear at a time.

It’s ok.

After all,

this is a good day.




“I Dissans Tid”

 Some things in life are difficult to believe unless we’ve got visible proof.

It makes it hard to grasp something when we can’t see it,  feel it, or touch it.

Nevertheless  – at night the stars become visible to our eyes, even though we can’t see them during the day.

For those of you that have followed my blog over the last year, know that it’s been a huge transition for me.

Little did I know back in 2002, when the first seeds were planted for this journey, that it was gonna take a whole decade to fully manifest the transition in me. Looking in the rearview mirror, I think “not knowing” that time-frame was for the best – cause I might have bailed and chosen the easy way out.

This shift, of getting to know who I am and balancing the “reasoning” and “intuition” in this wolrd, has been a trial-and-error-experience. Crossing the line, being in balance, trust the soul’s path, dealing with sickness and injuries, let love in, overcome tresholds, refining and defining who I am as I pave the path in my life… it’s been a beautiful and rough period that have moulded me and prepared me for the shift this year, 2012…

This last weekend was very emotional and odd in so many ways. Beautiful signs here and there showing me that I’m connected to my self, yet new obstacles popping up to delay the journey’s destination and not moving too fast forward. New “tests” making my life a roller-coaster of love-fear coming and going.

With tears in my eyes, I found a poem that My Mom sent me about 6 months ago – “I Dissans tid/In Dissan’s time” (Dissan is my nickname…). She wrote it when my everyday was a true struggle and I didn’t wanna live anymore. This poem means the world to me, it brings me comfort and it reminds me that the feeling of trust deep down within, exists even in the darkest of times. And even if I can’t see an outcome of things, or a result – if I trust that inner seed of love and passion, over time I’ll experience the coal becoming a diamond, or watching the caterpillar blossoming into a beautiful butterfly…

The poem was written in Swedish, but I’ll do a translation in english below…

I Dissans tid

Som ett smycke

av renaste guld

är ditt liv

i detta nu



ditt livs besmyckning

dess form

dess ädelstenar



för att en dag






In Dissan’s Time

As a jewelry

of purest gold

is your life

in this moment

The charm

your life’s embellishment

its shape

its precious gems



to one day






We’re all diamonds, amazingly and uniqely faceted…

Love and Light







another day in paradise


                     a walk on the beach

                                              healing ocean

                            my soul is  at rest

                                             even on a cloudy day like this

everything is perfect  

                      just as it should be      

                                    I’m back in the City of Angels

                                                                Three weeks so far

                                                                              letting things unfold at its own pace

             and as always:

                                                                          “everything and nothing has happened”

                                                                                when I’m here


 I just happen, life happens…


                                              different perspective

shift focus


                          hikes in the mountains.

                                                      naps on the beach.

it’s amazing.

                                        Life is amazing.



       this place nurtures my soul      


to be the eye of the storm

decontaminating in a polluted place

yeah life is funny

                                                             I know, and, I love it it


                  a healthy mindset

                               not polluted at all

                                                  a breeze of love

                                                                        brushing through

                                                                        surrounded by the people I attract

                                                      strangers that become friends

      we’re all people

 having the opportunity

                                                 to share love unconditionally

                                     to choose which hurricane to flow with…

                                                                                                                                               time out

let life happen . be . recieve.

cause, like the wall in Santa Monica says:


it doesn’t have to be more complicated than that


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Dear Dear Aria – a lullaby dedicated to one of the greatest inspirations on earth:


Fading – cover of Dutch singer Anouk’s amazing song:


A Case Of You – I love Joni Mitchell and Diana Krall! This is me kind of merging into their versions of this beautiful Joni-tune:


listen to the ocean

hear the inner teacher

the deepest core

be a love warrior

/ Seaturtle